Look Forward, Not Backward
What the point in looking back, when nothing can be changed. No matter how hard you try - the 'could have beens', 'what ifs' and 'would haves' - will never ever come true. The past is the past and thats where its meant to be. No matter the days spent in misery or happiness. The contrasts between the two ends of the emotion spectrum - there is nothing that can be done to change the past. The mistakes that should have been corrected. The friends that should have still been close to your heart. The lives that you changed for better or for the worse. Time is unforgiven on everyone. No matter which angle you want to take life from - there will always be happiness and sadness. Its a fact that most people that the worse of times with great upset and depression. Its a fact that when your happy, everything tends to just slip away. For that moment of bliss - all your problems and fears tend to disappear for that instance. No matter what - happiness can never harm (unless your happy when you harm people =_=;; you sadist)
Been thinking so much. Well, since everything was out in the open before. And as my friend told me before - whats the point in pretending who you are. You are who you are and you should be proud of it. No matter how many people say how wrong you are - everyone makes mistakes in life. But you can never change who you are. What is the point in making someone so happy - when you cant even make yourself happy. Whats the point in making someone happy when your being who you are. All your doing is lying to yourself. Your lying to everyone. Putting a mask infront of the world - playing the role of the good guy, the role of the person everyone wants to see, the person that everyone expects of you. In the end, everyone is stingy to some extent. No matter if your the purest of hearts or the worse of hearts - everyone will think of themselves at one point in their lives. Its human nature to put yourself at an advantage to others when able to. Its only a matter of how much we want to resist that temptation in life. Some exploit others. Some use cunning ways to push themselves forward. No matter how 'good' you are or think you are - are we in the end?
Ive made honest mistakes in the past 2 years. Yes, i do admit i should be accounted for those mistakes. And i have been. Whatever your sin, it will be repaid double in some way or another - part of the theory of karma. Yet, we can never run from the fact that we all have sinned. We've all taken the easier path over the right one in some point in time - its a fact of life. I truly have tried to do my best for everyone. Tried to make them happy in whatever way i could - no strings attached. No repayments. No wants. No needs. Just to see the plain happiness on their faces. Knowing that ive done a good deed. That was good enough for me. I didnt care if they never talked to me ever again. As long as i did something to please someone. Yet, that was who i was. Thats what i thought i was supposed to do. Keeping a lifelong promise to myself that if i was capable, i would help whoever i could. Even if it simply was to make them smile. And i admit - i got caught, tangled in the webs of deceits and cravings. Wanting to push myself forward. Wanting things. Wanting everything. Isnt that a normal human desire? Yet, as i pushed myself further and further into trying to help people - i got lost inbetween the fine line between making people happy and making myself happy. Life tends to cloud the mind with unforseen and unimaginable thoughts - which at first seem so nice. So blissful. So perfect. But is it? The more you seem to accomplish a promise - the further you get from it. That was my paradox. Yet, not knowing your falling into a trapt which you promised yourself never to fall into. Time fades everything.
Yes. I admit i made mistakes. I admit that i did so many wrongs in the past. And to come to the point of knowing it clearly. Knowing that i wanted to change. Yet, not being allowed to show how much i changed. From people changing their minds time and time again when i all wanted was one simple answer. One simple direction to take. Instead of going back and forth time and time again only to find that i was more miserable now than i was before i started trying. Yet, whats the point in life if you dont stand up and stand out. Whats the point if you dont take risks. Learn a few more saying in life that i have chosen to act on.
Never be a fence sitter, otherwise your balls will hurt. =_=;; thats a saying i never really forgot. Though never really knew where it came from.
Never place words before actions. Unless your certain that your capable and your going to forfill it.
Never do on others, what you wouldnt other do on you. Or to some relation to that phrase was in the bible.
From everything thats happened to me. To everything that is meant to have happened to me for me to repay my debt to my soul. For all the mistakes i have done. For all the heartbreaks that i have caused. For everything wrong that i have done. At least now, i have a clean conscience. At least now - i am refreshed knowing who i was before. Who i wanted to be. What i need to do. Everything is finally clear to me.
As I promised myself almost a decade ago. To make others happy, without the intention of any personal desires. Withstanding the fact that people may look down on me, may take advantage of me. If i can bring a smile to someone's face. Thats good enough for me. And for now, thats how i will stand. I will stand firm.
A foolish man will want to die for a heroic cause. A wise man will want to die in a humble nature.
No one is a hero in everyone's eyes. Yet, no matter how small you are. No matter where you come from. No matter what you've done. You could always be a hero in someone's heart.
Never look back, always look forward. Know what there is to be done and do it with all your heart. No matter how small the task - do it as best as you can. Nothing can be changed with what you've done before. But, everything can change with what your willing and able to do.
Been thinking so much. Well, since everything was out in the open before. And as my friend told me before - whats the point in pretending who you are. You are who you are and you should be proud of it. No matter how many people say how wrong you are - everyone makes mistakes in life. But you can never change who you are. What is the point in making someone so happy - when you cant even make yourself happy. Whats the point in making someone happy when your being who you are. All your doing is lying to yourself. Your lying to everyone. Putting a mask infront of the world - playing the role of the good guy, the role of the person everyone wants to see, the person that everyone expects of you. In the end, everyone is stingy to some extent. No matter if your the purest of hearts or the worse of hearts - everyone will think of themselves at one point in their lives. Its human nature to put yourself at an advantage to others when able to. Its only a matter of how much we want to resist that temptation in life. Some exploit others. Some use cunning ways to push themselves forward. No matter how 'good' you are or think you are - are we in the end?
Ive made honest mistakes in the past 2 years. Yes, i do admit i should be accounted for those mistakes. And i have been. Whatever your sin, it will be repaid double in some way or another - part of the theory of karma. Yet, we can never run from the fact that we all have sinned. We've all taken the easier path over the right one in some point in time - its a fact of life. I truly have tried to do my best for everyone. Tried to make them happy in whatever way i could - no strings attached. No repayments. No wants. No needs. Just to see the plain happiness on their faces. Knowing that ive done a good deed. That was good enough for me. I didnt care if they never talked to me ever again. As long as i did something to please someone. Yet, that was who i was. Thats what i thought i was supposed to do. Keeping a lifelong promise to myself that if i was capable, i would help whoever i could. Even if it simply was to make them smile. And i admit - i got caught, tangled in the webs of deceits and cravings. Wanting to push myself forward. Wanting things. Wanting everything. Isnt that a normal human desire? Yet, as i pushed myself further and further into trying to help people - i got lost inbetween the fine line between making people happy and making myself happy. Life tends to cloud the mind with unforseen and unimaginable thoughts - which at first seem so nice. So blissful. So perfect. But is it? The more you seem to accomplish a promise - the further you get from it. That was my paradox. Yet, not knowing your falling into a trapt which you promised yourself never to fall into. Time fades everything.
Yes. I admit i made mistakes. I admit that i did so many wrongs in the past. And to come to the point of knowing it clearly. Knowing that i wanted to change. Yet, not being allowed to show how much i changed. From people changing their minds time and time again when i all wanted was one simple answer. One simple direction to take. Instead of going back and forth time and time again only to find that i was more miserable now than i was before i started trying. Yet, whats the point in life if you dont stand up and stand out. Whats the point if you dont take risks. Learn a few more saying in life that i have chosen to act on.
Never be a fence sitter, otherwise your balls will hurt. =_=;; thats a saying i never really forgot. Though never really knew where it came from.
Never place words before actions. Unless your certain that your capable and your going to forfill it.
Never do on others, what you wouldnt other do on you. Or to some relation to that phrase was in the bible.
From everything thats happened to me. To everything that is meant to have happened to me for me to repay my debt to my soul. For all the mistakes i have done. For all the heartbreaks that i have caused. For everything wrong that i have done. At least now, i have a clean conscience. At least now - i am refreshed knowing who i was before. Who i wanted to be. What i need to do. Everything is finally clear to me.
As I promised myself almost a decade ago. To make others happy, without the intention of any personal desires. Withstanding the fact that people may look down on me, may take advantage of me. If i can bring a smile to someone's face. Thats good enough for me. And for now, thats how i will stand. I will stand firm.
A foolish man will want to die for a heroic cause. A wise man will want to die in a humble nature.
No one is a hero in everyone's eyes. Yet, no matter how small you are. No matter where you come from. No matter what you've done. You could always be a hero in someone's heart.
Never look back, always look forward. Know what there is to be done and do it with all your heart. No matter how small the task - do it as best as you can. Nothing can be changed with what you've done before. But, everything can change with what your willing and able to do.
posted by Gin at 3:53 am
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